So hear I go being controversial again but manifesting your destiny by fanciful thinking is nonsense. Now before you get up in arms , I am not trying to squash dreams or say they are not valuable. I am currently living out huge parts of my dream. The final piece is yet to come where I speak at Super Soul Sunday and if O and I can stop playing phone tag and I can free up some time it will happen.
But you see what I mean here. IF this was my measurement of success I would never have started. Fanciful thinking just gets you to notice the huge gap between where you are now and where you dream of being. (Neuroscience – Demotivating)
In 2010 or so, I heard of health coaching as a living. I began studying. All things, all ways. I did contract coaching with Provant and Cigna and volunteered to speak at education events while nursing . Later I switched careers to mental health nursing to further my experience. All the while with the dream of doing what I now get to do as a career.
I did not sit at home imagining a celebrity life or wishing it in to existence. Did I have a vision?Of course!! But in starts and stops, and pitfalls, bumps and agony ,I did my very best to act in ways that made it closer to reality.
Now to Shonda.
I tend not to have the time for self help books but had severe FOMA when Shonda Rhimes “Year of Yes “came up at The Willie Wags Book Club. About page 78 she started talking about the difference between dreamers and doers. I could have kissed her and if she and I record Oprah on the same day I will.
Hence my reference to Nike and doing it.
If the 10 yr old cave girl constantly compared herself to, and wished to magically become, the Chieftess (as we sometimes are told to do in imagining ourselves to be celebrities ) we are miserable. Because first of all ,we tend to struggle enough with feeling we do not really have the talent and abilities to make things happen, let alone comparing ourselves to someone with all the resources in the world.
But if the cavegirl emulates and copies the attitude and ACTIONS of someone who she views as successful? Now we are talking. So if you want to feel confident,what actions would a confident you be doing daily? Start small but start ! Feeling lonely??What actions would a non lonely person be doing if you followed them around all day? Copy those. I am NOT saying this is easy, but it is effective.
So dream. Never stop. But tie it to movement. Everyday , realistic, can do it even though it sucks sometimes, movements. I have said it before and I will again. We really are a bag of chemicals. What can you DO that makes you feel as though you are winning ?? (Charlie Sheen ha ha)
Because if you start the day catching a fish ,you will certainly believe you can, and therefore will , build that incredible hut and become your own kind of leader.